Green birds beneath the Throne

I keep wanting to say things to you
I keep wanting to share things with you
I keep forgetting that you are gone
I’m dreaming about you
I’m thinking about how beautiful you’ll be
With your hair long and dark and curly like that, the curls that twist about in my fingers and bouncing around
Your smiling eyes like those days when you were happy

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View of the Haram from the Hilton Towers

Ramadan Witr Duah from the Haram

Glory to the One who is Lord of all lords;

Glory to the One who facilitates all means;

Glory to the One whose throne is in the heavens, and in the earth is His authority ; glory to the One whom no creature of this life can see, and Whom no sense can perceive; and Whom description seekers cannot perceive; and Whom incidents do not change; and He does not fear His creatures

Oh Giver of refuge for those who seek refuge; Beloved of those who love; Hope of those who are cut off; Raiser of the fallen; The One who is with broken hearts;

Who answers the calls of the dejected; the Mercy of this life and the hereafter and the Compassion of both; Who answers the desires of those in need

Oh Allah, guide us by Your favor among those whom You have guided; and forgive us among those whom You have forgiven; and be our Protector among those whom You have protected; and bless us in all that You have given us; and save us and keep away from us any evil which You have decreed; verily You decree and none decrees besides what You decree; and none is abased whom You befriend; and none holds power whom You oppose.

Oh Allah, distance our sins from our obedience to You that will lead us to paradise; and indeed from certainty in faith comes difficulty in the life of this world

And bless us our hearing, and our sight, and our faculties, as long as You allow us to live; and make them protectors for us against the transgressions we have committed; and make us victorious over our enemies; and do not allow us to have problems in our deen; and do not allow us to make the life of this world our greatest concern; and remove from us difficulty in attaining knowledge; and do not make hellfire our destination; and make jannah our home; and do not impose upon us, because of our sins, people who lack mercy and do not fear You (as authorities over us)

Oh Allah, preserve us with steadfastness in Islam while we’re standing; and preserve us in Islam while we’re sitting; and preserve us in Islam while we’re sleeping

Oh Allah bless us with a pure life; and an easy death; and a return to You without grief and difficulty;

Oh Allah help us with our death; and with the grave and its punishment; and from slipping from the siraat; and the Day of Reckoning and its terror

Our Lord, You created us in the best of forms; and You granted us sustenance from Your bounty; and You taught us and gave us guidance; and then we disobeyed You openly, but You forgave us; and we committed sins, but You availed us from them; Your generosity has been descending upon us, yet we sin easily, and we are weak; if You look to our account then we indeed deserve punishment; but Your mercy is more expansive than our sins, so grant us Your mercy, oh the Most Merciful of those who show mercy

Oh Allah give us, and do not deprive us; and increase for us, and do not decrease us; and be generous to us, and do not be severe with us; and grace us, and do not disgrace us; and help us, and do not forsake us

Oh Allah, make white our faces (with light and give us our books on our right; and raise our degrees in status; and make our balances heavy (on the side of good and overlook our sins

Oh Allah, allow the month of Ramadan to be completed in Your pleasure; ; and with us attaining the success of entering Your garden

Oh our Lord, this holy month has indeed past; and we stand fearful and shaking before You; and we hope in You; accept from us, our Lord, our fasting ; and our standing in worship ; and our prayers; and our remembrance ; and all our deeds; and do not reject our deeds on the Day of Judgement, the Day of regret and shame

Oh our Hope when all doors are closed; and our Hope when all links are cut; and when there is a barrier between us and our family and our people (and we stand alone)

Oh Allah, forgive all the Muslims that have died who bore witness to Your oneness; and (who bore witness) to Your messenger with his message; and who died upon that

Oh Allah reward them and grant them goodness in the best way; and pardon and forgive their sins; so that they feel tranquility in their graves; and so that on the day of judgement they will be among the protected ones;

Oh Allah, move them from the narrowness of the grave and the insects, to everlasting jannah; with , comfort and vast shade

Oh Allah, grant us mercy when we reach where they have reached, under casket and soil, alone; oh Allah, grant us mercy when our families wash us; and mercy when they shroud us; and mercy when they carry us on their shoulders; and mercy when they lower us into our graves; and mercy when they throw on us dirt by Your mercy, oh the Most Merciful of those who show mercy

Oh Allah, bring down upon our graves the light of our fasting; and the light of our prayers ; and the light of our recitation of Qur’an

Oh Allah, forgive the Muslim men and the Muslim women; and the believing men and the believing women; those living and those dead; You are our Protector; Hearer, the Near, the One who answers our dua

Oh Allah, we ask You for all good ; the sooner of it and the later; what we know of it and what we don’t know; and we seek refuge in You from all evil; the sooner of it and the later; what we know of it and what we don’t know

Oh Allah, whatever You have distributed in this blessed night of health and well being, then make us,

Oh our Lord, among the fortunate who receive from this distribution; and whatever You have distributed in this night of trial , keep it from us and from the Muslims

Oh Allah strengthen Islam and the Muslims; and disgrace shirk and the mushrikeen; and smash the enemies of the deen

Oh Allah, our Lord, better the condition of the Muslims; oh Allah better the young of us; and better the old of us; and better the women of us; and make better the children of us; and our spouses

Oh Allah, save the necks of our fathers; and our mothers; and our brothers; and our sisters; and our paternal uncles; and our paternal aunts; and our maternal uncles; and our maternal aunts; and those who love us for Your sake; and those who love each other for Your sake; and those who lead us to good ; and those who facilitate good; and all the Muslims, oh Lord of the worlds

Oh Allah, help Your servants and the mujahideen in Your way in all places; Oh Allah help your worshippers in Chechnya; and in Bosnia; and in Palestine; and in Lebanon (Iraq, Sudan, Afghanistan, etc and in all other places

Oh Allah, make firm their feet; Oh Allah guide their aim; oh Allah, join them on the word of clear truth

Oh our Lord..

Overlook our sins when we reach The Gate and do not return us in disappointment

Oh Allah, accept our dua

Oh Allah, accept our dua

Oh Allah, accept our dua

and do not return us in disappointment; and do not deprive us from Your generosity that we seek; and do not return us deprived from Your blessings

Oh Allah, make us from amongst the fortunate who will attain the reward of laylatul qadr

Oh Allah, make us from amongst the fortunate who will attain the reward of laylatul qadr

Oh Allah, make us from amongst the fortunate who will attain the reward of laylatul qadr by Your mercy, oh the Most Merciful of those who show mercy

Oh our Lord, grant us good in this life, and good in the hereafter, and keep us from the punishment of the fire

Oh Allah, we seek refuge in You from Your displeasure; and we seek Your forgiveness, and we seek refuge in You from Your punishment

I cannot account for the praises that are due to You;

You are as You praise Yourself. And peace and blessings be upon the messenger Muhammad, and upon his family and companions.


the path to beauty is surrounded by thorns

do what you love

figure out what you enjoy and do that.  If money is what motivates you start planning for a miserable life.

When you start trying to do what you think you enjoy, you are bound to come across many, many barriers.  Some of those will seem insurmountable.

The key is, to realize the barriers are actually just in your head.  Once you realize everything is an illusion, you can move forward not only with ease, but with calmness in your heart.

If you can’t get past the illusions, go back to the step where you plan for a miserable life.

Musa & Khidr

Musa (Moses), Khidr, and Sabr (patience)

Allah (SWT) revealed the Quran as a reminder and as a guidance for mankind. So while some things we hear in the recitation might make us think, ‘wow that’s so cool’, there is also always a lesson to be learned. Today as Hammad Hai was reciting Surah Al-Kahf, and Allah narrates the story of Khidr and Musa, it occurred to me that there is more to this than simply the amazing story of Khidr’s actions and the surprising reasons/wisdom behind them. When Musa first encounters Khidr, Khidr tells him, you won’t be able to have sabr (patience, forebearance) with me, and then he says, and how can you have sabr regarding that do which you have no knowledge?

When he said this, I got to thinking – Allah (SWT) tests each of us all the time. Sometimes when things go south for us, we get frustrated, and we complain – even if only to Allah (SWT). But we also know that these trials are for our own benefit – we are supposed to improve as a result. So it occurred to me, that at the time of fitnah, we lose sight of this, because we have no knowledge of how Allah (SWT) is testing us. Therefore, we lose the opportunity for sabr by complaining in our short sightedness.

Indeed, Allah (SWT) is with as Sabirun.


My eyes are filled with the vastness of the pale sky.  It’s cloudy but the clouds are high up so all I see is this bleached out white/blue color of the sky staring back at me.  My lungs are on fire.  Liquid fills my throat and as I gag I try not to panic wondering where my next breath is going to come from.  The echo of the explosion from the gunshot is still fading from my hearing, but dimly somewhere I think I heard sirens, or maybe those were screams.  I’m not sure.  Are those flashes of red and white lights from an emergency vehicle or is this what I’m seeing as my brain starves for oxygen?

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